BTT #68: A Dream of Passage

Walls leaf water
Walls Of Jericho.  Southern Tennesee.  Photo by Lona Gynt

 

A Dream of Passage

·

Anchored in the

Amber light

Of waking

I can still feel

Resting faintly

On my cheek

The faded tracing

Of your caress

My once and ever

Friend held fast.

·

I still see you

Walking neither

With myself

Or with my shadow,

But with the

Mere idea

Rounding out

Encircling arcs

And sorrows

In a stream.

·

I somehow always

Felt I held you

Only as water

Running in and

Over again

Upon ourselves,

Held from one

Another not by

Bars or chains

Of iron, but only

By the smallest crack

In the foundations,

Promising no

More then

Than to

Finish each

Other’s sentences.

·

How were we

Not passed over?

Was there

No stain above

The watching door?

And what

Rounding horns

Were bound with

Cords upon

The silent altar?

All I seem

To know is

That the wind

Cannot find

Space between

Our fingers,

Clutching as they do

At the desperate

Pleading searches

Of our grasp.

·

Lona Gynt.   May 19, 2020.  All rights reserved for photos and text to Lona Gynt.

·

Linked to dVerse Tuesday Poetics.  Today  Anmol invites us to post a poem about portals, passage, or change.  Here is the link to his prompt.

·

dVerse Poetics: About Portals

 

Walls tree
Walls Of Jericho.  Southern Tennesee.  Photo by Lona Gynt

40 thoughts on “BTT #68: A Dream of Passage

  1. I really like the use of assonance in the lines:
    ‘Anchored in the
    Amber light
    Of waking’,
    Read aloud, it sounds like a yawn – and I love the use of colour.
    There is wistfulness in ‘I held you / Only as water’ and ‘Promising no / More then / Than to / Finish each / Other’s sentences’. ‘The watching door’ is ominous.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes “Johnny” (hehe Johnny – now that makes me always laugh).
      but yes, grief and love are inextricable, the same thing maybe. I would not trade off love to avoid grief, and I would not trade either to not live. I love you brother.

      Like

    1. Zactly. Untimely Self-knowlege can be perilous for relationships. But the journey is magical and not regretted. I hope only that we humans can offer each other a measure of grace in our sorrows and always remember the joy.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. This is poignant–the love that still remains in memory. I liked the imagery of water, wind, cracks in foundations, doors. . .
    Then if reminded me of Leonard Cohen’s “Anthem,”:
    “There is a crack in everything (there is a crack in everything)
    That’s how the light gets in”

    I suppose that works for dreams and memories, too.
    And finally the title (which I went back to see)–other portals–life passages and dreams.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. thank you Merril, also, so good to see you! I will need to look at the Cohen song, yes, it is true, that crack in the foundation did eventually separate us, but it also let in light. Light of who I am, and how life can be hopeful going forward. I can finally know who I am, and am finding life to be feeling real. It is difficult for marriages in our circumstance to survive, I only know of a few in which a transgender person finally accepts herself and transitions later in life when the marriage survives. My wife has been so kind, and would say that I am the driver of the divorce actually, but I feel the truth this crack at the foundation revealed. It is hard to be maried with a woman when you are not yourself a lesbian, love is there, it is not merely sexual, there is a basic acceptance and affirmation that could just not be realized despite efforts. this is sad for me, and I have carried blame, but the love was always real. And your littel comment seemed to chime for me the incisive reading of what I have felt. the first stanza was written actually in 1990 early in our marriage, but stayed hidden in trepidation. the others have been added this year.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Ahh–I suspected, but I wasn’t actually sure if what I thought the poem was about was what you just described. I’m sorry about your divorce, and I can understand that the love is still there, but it is different. How could it not be?

        Liked by 1 person

  3. AH, that is quite a love poem and I am reeling with the effect of its familiar but sweet metaphors (made sweeter because of their familiarity). It’s so good to read your penmanship again, Lona! I recognize now how I have missed it. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Thank you friend, I appreciate it so much. I have also missed being here as much as I would like. I want to tell you that you prompt on “Darkness” last Fall inspired me, I wrote something, but have not felt quite ready to bring it to light yet, but thank you for that as well.

    Like

  5. kaykuala

    Clutching as they do
    At the desperate
    Pleading searches
    Of our grasp

    One may be called upon to provide help at different times for which we are not in a position to fulfill sometimes. This happens Lona, yes!

    Hank

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think that may be true, if we don’t slow down from time to time, we may hardly be aware of the wonders of the passage. I appreciate you and your incisive readings Bjorn. 🙂

      Like

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