BTT #74: Memory of a park bench on a winter night

Memory of a park bench on a winter night

.

We may say

We seek the light,

When in fact it hardly

Ever lets us go,

Surrounding us in

Its patient holds

It has us, we children

Thinking we feel so

Searchingly the need

To open, look and see.

.

But it can

Still surprise us

Sometimes, when dawn

Mixes softly with white linens

Bending on a quiet morning

In the breeze.

.

Or it can

Also clobber

As when switches are

Flipped upward

Sharply bringing a

A flood of stinging

Daggers to the eyes,  

Clarity grumbly rubbing

Itself out into the day.

.

Light tries to die

Only in glorious gasps

And pyres,

But I am not

Remembering sunsets

Drowning fires,

But just all the

Slowly nourished

Lies and expectations

We learn at

First breathings

In the morning of the day,

Carefully clinging

Like frost etched

Onto the branches

Of the trees

Until that searching

Touch of sunshine

Makes it seem

Briefly the whole

World were singing

In a small corner

Before the dancing

Glitter burns away.

.

But here now

In this night,

I close my eyes

To neither pray

Nor rale against

The dark.

But to rest

Where it holds

Me here, between

The avenues where

A bird laughs

At the moonlight

And black waters

Circle slowly in the park,

And your hand

Rises into mine,

A soft shoulder

Leans against me

Leading into nothing

That we know

But questions breathing

In each other where

Even still behind

This blackness

Of lids closing

And lips touching

And hope waiting

A garden might yet grow.

.

-Lona Gynt, December 2020, All Rights reserved.

.

This is linked to Open Link Night over at dVerse. Hosted by Bjorn. Link on over.

Wrote this a year ago on the night after my fiance’ Carly and I first kissed. I have fixed it and finished it and post it here tonight. Dedicated to Carly, who has brought a garden of new love to my life.

32 thoughts on “BTT #74: Memory of a park bench on a winter night

  1. I like the many ways that you describe light: holding, surprising, even clobbering sometimes. My favorite part is in the beginning, the reminder that the light “hardly ever lets us go,” though we are constantly searching for it, unaware of it.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. A lovely memory and dedication, Lona. Romance shields against the cold. I find these lines particularly captivating:
    ‘Sometimes, when dawn
    Mixes softly with white linens
    Bending on a quiet morning
    In the breeze.’
    I also love:
    ‘A bird laughs
    At the moonlight
    And black waters
    Circle slowly in the park,
    And your hand
    Rises into mine’.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Kim. I am so glad you liked those parts. When I first wrote this, I called it “Autumn Night” it was in early November of last year. But in thinking back to it, it was a pretty cold night, cold enough to qualify as a winter poem. I am glad somebody noticed the bird. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Colleen@ LOOSELEAFNOTES

    The light is a magical thing that has an effect on everything. I think every light is a little darkness and every darkness has a little light. I especially like this line: Light tries to die / Only in glorious gasps / And pyres.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. yo are correct, light wouldn’t know what it was for without darkness, and darkness would be absolutely just void without light. I am glad you liked those lines about light dying, I am not sure they are always accurate, ie: when the dusk on a cloudy day fades slowly and imperceptibly to night. but the image does hold with blazing sunsets, and fireworks, and sparks crackling upward from a fire, and even on a small level with the small explosions that are erased when a light switch is turned, and When the frost refracts brilliantly into dissipation.

      Like

  4. Beautiful imagery. I enjoyed the contrast and movement of the light and darkness and in the end the acceptance that you can rest in the dark – I see it metaphorically here as a questioning what will come in the future. I supposed the dark is when we need faith. The light is the times we are enlightened and yes, is it fleeting and can leave abruptly in “glorious gasps.” I love a poem that makes me think philosophically! 💕

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am so glad this resonated with you, when the way is dark in front of us it can be hard to know what will be coming, but sometimes light can also be deceiving and is certainly fleeting, like the frost. I don’t know if they are always in juxtaposition, your comment actually brought Psalm 139:12 to mind:
      “Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You, But the night shines as the day; The darkness and the light are both alike to You.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, a beautiful scripture. I suppose light can be deceiving, 2 Corinthians 11:14 comes to mind with Satan masquerading as an angel of light. It is interesting how light and darkness are used in the Bible throughout, as well as other ancient texts. ✨

        Liked by 1 person

    1. That is a great insight, and that protection was one of my main feelings. The initial draft was actually written in response to the wonderful events of that night, but also by Anmol’s prompt last November about darkness. I just had not finished it until the other day. I ought to let him know. Appreciate all you do for dVerse 🙂

      Like

  5. As I was reading this, it was like uncovering layers–or perhaps unwrapping a present–that gift of love. And there is such peace in these lines:
    In this night,

    I close my eyes

    To neither pray

    Nor rale against

    The dark.

    But to rest

    Where it holds

    Me here, between

    The avenues where

    A bird laughs

    At the moonlight. . .

    I know you’ve had a difficult time the last few years, and I’m happy you’ve found a new love. Best wishes on your engagement! ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Merril, thank you so much, that is such a wonderful image and reading, I do think that layers of wrapping has been removed bit by bit to reveal this joy I am having now. Makes me tear a bit to think of it, I am grateful for you friend. We can think we know for years and decades and entire lifetimes that a plan or “the light” if yo will is mapped out in front of us, and even thaough it looks so clear or even beautiful, if it runs counter to a deep hidden emotionsl truth, it will never just bring peace. I have found more peace in that dark that night, hiding from others and their eyes and their judgments, and just feeling the truth of being there with a person who sees me, truly, and cared only about me becasue of the essential me, not becasue of the planned me, or the gospel me, or the dogmatic me, or the assignedsocietal role me, but about me, and for me to see her the same way, the feelings running counter to every trick of light I thought I had known and defended and taught and committed to, and yet in the end could not bring peace. The darkheld and fed me, it was so nice , but it was cold, which was amenable to sitting close on that bench 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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